A mile is a mile...

This week I started going to school full-time, which include two PE online classes, Swimming for Conditioning and Physical Activity for Weight Control. It was a busy, exhausting week, but I felt so good at the end of the week. Tuesday morning I woke-up early to meet with Spencer at 5:30am and go walking at the track. I tried alternating running and walking. Unfortunately, I pushed myself too much and had a melt down. I was so embarrassed that I was so out of shape. Losing weight is 10% diet, 10% exercise, and 80% mental/emotional. Ever since, I was a little girl, I have always been embarrassed about exercising and being active in front of others. I have mental walls that I need to break down, but I'm trying to do it one step at a time.

After Tuesday, I decided to stick with walking for now. I woke up early to go walking Wednesday, Thursday, and Friday! I think this week I'll push myself a little more this week and go a little faster and further. Little by little I will get to where I want to be!

I also started swimming on Thursday. It was hard to swim laps again because I really haven't done it in 4 yrs. On Friday, Spencer came to the pool with me to time me and count my lap for a pre-test for my Swimming for Conditioning class. I swam 7 laps (350 yards!) in 12 minutes! I was so proud of myself! I plan to go swimming 4 times this week.

Even though I am proud of all the physical activity I've been doing this week, I've struggled mentally and emotionally with my weight. Last night two of my dear friends got engaged at my house. At the end of the evening we took a picture of the four of us all together. When I looked at the picture and saw how big I am, it really bothered me. I don't see myself the way I am. I picture myself smaller in my head. However, I think it's good to see the truth and know that I can continue to work towards what I want to be!

 In 2 years, we will take this picture again, and I will be smaller!

For those of you who don't know, Spencer is my boyfriend. He has been an amazing support! He pushes me to do more, but when he knows I've gone too far, he's there to give me a hug and support me emotionally. I know he accepts me the way I am, but is proud of how hard I am working to become healthier. I want to be able to go running, hiking, and dancing all night with him, but I need to get in better shape. He is leaving for a mission in 6 weeks which I'm super excited about for him! He will be an awesome missionary! I keep telling him that when he comes home, he won't be able to recognize me. I plan to focus more on myself and my plan ahead of me! By the way, he has lost 10 lbs and 2 inches in his waist (which he doesn't have much to lose) in the past month! Good job Spencer!!!

Well, I better get to bed so I can go work hard tomorrow!!!

Starting weight: 365 lbs
Current weight: 324 lbs

Total weight lost: 41 lbs!!! Now to gain some muscle and strength so I can burn more fat!!!